I do not know why I am exactly writing this ! All I know that I am thinkin of that girl all day long !
She is a single mom with two adorable kids.
The girl's blog , I passed by ! by chance , through globalvoices , as some post of it was published on it today .and once I got to check it out , I was completely attracted ,attached and captured to Oblivia.
I know for some reason that I felt pitty for her , reminds me of one of things I always say to myself and had to do to my fiance , is that..I canot buy betrayals..it is not an option ! I cant eat it ! i am sorry !
and I was always sorry for all the moms , and women around who passed through it , and I guess I saw many living examples, some agreed on surviving and tryin to forgive for kids sake " which myself I see they never forgave anyway , they just couldnot , so their life and kids was a livin hell "..,well some others couldnot take it , and got divorced , some could go on, some paused and stopped in time.
but I know that the cheatin on one's back is PAIN that no one can tell how it feels ! n you cant ask a woman to forgive that though.
And I just can not think of one reason that would make a husband do so to his family and his beloved wife ! why so ?! Girl, I dont want to make it any harsh on you..I really dont mean to.
It is just one of things I ever thought of ! and one of the things that always kept me away from marriage idea..the fact is all men are " 3einhom zaygha "..canot be satisfied with one woman ! even if she is Ms Universe ! he will still look for some ordinary girl to convince himself that he has needs that he didnt find in that first one who was to be Ms Universe ! but C'mon , who needs Ms universe now ! I need someone can cook for me ! clean the house !! etc...and if he chose her to be of that type at the beginning , he would later on complain of her cookin smell ! her nasty look ! whatever and go lookin for Ms Universe ! This is man for me !! and he goes on and on ! and he never feels satisfied ! content !
Throughout his marriage , I dont mind him to stop ! take a decision ! talk it out ! and decide not to go on ! admit it ! and tells his partner that he doesnt want to go on ! or at least he is not satisfied with one woman only in his life and needs to have another ! in this case, she has all rights then to go on or step back.
thats the minimum he can do ! and he should leave her the decision , and he should be givin her all rights too ! but it shouldnot be NEVER a cheat on one's back ! never !! that is mean ! thats cheap ! thats one thing I cant fnd a proper word for !
So, if you man canot think twice before goin after your instincts..if you cant think of your family , your wife , your kids , morals.....whatever that should prevent you from takin sucha step ! you lose then ! coz you cant keep that faithful wife anymore, you cant gain her respect ! not anymore ! you cnat ask your kids to love you ! you cant ask for love from anyone ! not anymore !
and almost in all scenarios ! you feel the fault once your wife gets to know about it ! just then ! and you say sorry and give excuses and try to make it up ! and suddenly , you find out that you cant live without your wife and kids and that other woman was just a "nazwa" as you men love to call it more often ! as if women should by then be understanding and eat it !! bala 2araf !
and the funniest thing , that once you feel your wife is eating it and everything goes back to norm " which never happens as I hv seen in cases around , there is always bitterness that cant be burried in "..elmohem, once for you everything seems to be okay , and your wife forgot about that "little " thing you once did to her, you go back again on HAUNTING !!
What do you call that ?? you never learn ? Do you ?? and again cant find a proper word describing you then !
And what really kills , that he starts on blamin it on her ? and starts on sayin bullshit ! and he makes it sound as if she asked him to go and see another ! and whats more sad , that if one of the family members knew about it ! they will start givin HER the lessons of bein a wise wife and how to protect her house and husband ! and it sure was her fault that he was playin around !!
sick community ! sick you who think in such a way ! even when He is the one to blame you dont forget to blame it on HER instead !! how ugly is it !!
and I wonder if that woman you left your family runnin after will give you that love you dreamed for ! if it will last for extra months than supposed !..you know as much as I know the loss you gained and who is the loser indeed !
so you gotta think twice before you go and play around , you gotta think twice of the consequences ahead. and why dont you think of it on a religious way though ? that,it is 7aram !and what goes around comes around !!
And I wonder,if it was SHE , cheatin on him , would he take it ? would he accept it ? would he forgive ? would he go on and pass it without ever mentionin it in any fight later ? will he forgive that his wife was there in an affair with another ?? I doubt ! so why do you ask for forgiveness if you yourself cant give it in return ??
Dont ask for smth you cant give back !
And I believe , Religion prohibited it for both , to have a whatsoever called on other's back ! and the punishment is clear on that ! for both genders it is the same ! so why the hell the community is accepting it for men and just can not if it comes to women ?! this is not an invitation for both sexes to go do whatever !I am just mad at the community and society that let one live the way he wants , deal the way he likes, fool around and by end of day , community is proud of him coz he is a MAN !and MAN can do whatever he likes ?!? msh keda bardo !!
Their mothers are proud of them coz they had girlfriends at the age of 10 " and maybe less".
If you read the book " The poison tree" by Marwa Rakha, you will find what I am talkin about here, it is mentioned there in her book detailed ..the community helped in raisin our men the way they are now ! so I think we can not complain about it ! we hv to eat it then.
But you, mothers,young ones specially,you still have the chance to correct that..
please,do what it takes to save the coming generation from the posion we live in and hv to drink of.
DO your role in raisin good men , MEN in real meaning and manners not just in looks !
and Back to what I started my post with , all support to that little woman , whom I give my respect and prayers that she pass it soon..
and to you MAN , ra3ey rabenna fe meratak we 3eiltak, this quote is really meaningful for me...it truly touches me , if one can stop and think of it before he steps in any stupidity! IF !
3mry, I know , you might be readin this as well..you will at someday ! So ..I am askin you , Please.do not ever let me go through it ?! Please.. .You know, I will not be the one I used to be.